Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!!  Welcome 2010 :-)

It’s been a while since my last post.  So sorry about that… and about the fact that this may end up being a long one.  A lot has happened since my last post.

I’m a little disappointed with myself that I fell short of my weight loss goal for the end of the year.  I’d aimed at 20 pounds by 12/31/2009 and lost 19.  Not too far off but I was a little disappointed.  I did fall into the rut of emotional eating, which I now can totally recognize when I’m doing it, in the middle of December.  If I hadn’t, I probably would have reached my goal.  But, now that I know when I’m doing it I can be proactive about stopping it and focusing on something else to work through hard times.  And, it probably helps that I don’t keep any sort of snack food or junk food in the house anymore!

Last time I was here I wrote about my most recent biopsy, which I went into with a deep down horrible feeling.  Well, my feeling was confirmed when my doctor informed me that the sample had been “sent to Stanford for further evaluation”.  This is never a good thing when it comes to these biopsies.  So, I went on an amazing trip with Tamika, Pam, and about 150 other people in mid December with a heavy heart (I’ll tell you about the trip later).  On 12/17 I got one of those phone calls from my doctor that starts with “are you somewhere you can talk” which I know never leads to something that I want to hear.  She informed me that the biopsy was abnormal and that she wants me to be as aggressive as I possibly can be at this point, suggesting a hysterectomy now or, at the very least, another cone biopsy with a D&C (dilate and curettage).  Wow!  Really???  I’m thinking – you didn’t say cancer, you just said abnormal.  The pathology report said “Cannot definitively provide a benign diagnosis”.  It didn’t say cancer!!! The Gyn Oncologist originally said that I had 10 years until I should have a hysterectomy, unless the cancer came back, and it hasn’t even been 5.  I’m scared, angry, confused…spinning.  I’ve been here before and I need to get out of this mindset so that I can think clearly.  I need to talk to my Gyn Oncologist and my survivor sisters.  They’ll know what to do!  I contacted the ladies that night, spilling all of my fears and uncertainties into a Facebook message.  These women are amazing!  The amount of love and support that I’ve received from them, some of whom I’ve only met once or twice, is incredible.  I’m lucky to have all of them in my life.  They helped me see things through their experiences and the message string went back and forth for quite a while.  And, after almost 2 weeks, I got to go visit with my Gyn Oncologist.  I feel much better about things after talking through everything with him.  I know that he’d prefer that I have a hysterectomy before invasive disease appears but, for now, I will get to keep my uterus.  I’m starting work with a fertility clinic to find out if I can even have children, which is the sole reason for my not having a hysterectomy yet.

So, this amazing trip that Tamika, Pam, and I went on took us to a place that I’d never have the opportunity to go to on my own.  US Oncology has a conference every year called Life Beyond Cancer.  We had an opportunity of a lifetime to connect with other cancer survivors, stay at an amazing resort, get spa treatments, and learn new things about advocacy and different types of cancer and the experiences that they lead to.  We all know so much about what we’ve gone through and so little about the journeys of others.  It was an amazing experience!  We even went to Anita’s Beat Cancer Boot Camp, which totally kicked our booties!!  Seriously, my calves were so sore that I couldn’t actually straighten my legs for 4 days!  I loved it!  The healing ceremonies, the speakers, the food, and the activities were wonderful and, although there was very little down time during our visit, I went home revitalized and refreshed.  I’ll stop now so that I leave something for Tamika and Pam to write about  in their next posts.

I hope that each of you has a healthy, happy, prosperous, and love filled 2010 ahead!

Cindy

Ugh!!

This has been a really busy week!  Thanksgiving was last Thursday and, even with the holiday gatherings, I lost a pound last week.  Woo-hoo!  My plan of everything in moderation worked quite well… so did the extra gym time to work off any extra calories ;-)

Another thing happened on Thanksgiving that I hadn’t planned on – I “outed” myself as a cervical cancer survivor to my Granny and two cousins. This is something that Tamika and I have talked about on multiple occasions as I only told my immediate family and close friends about my diagnosis at first.  I was too scared of what was happening and didn’t want to worry anyone else unnecessarily.  So, I kept my diagnosis to myself and never told either of my grandmothers, aunts and uncles, or cousins.  Both of my grandmothers are worriers and I knew that the news would raise too much concern for either of them.  When I picked Granny up to take her to my parents’ house for Thanksgiving dinner I asked her if she’d ever wondered why I am so involved with cervical cancer organizations and she had.  So, before we drove off I explained the whole thing to her.  Having lost a sister and an aunt to ovarian cancer my diagnosis hit very close to her heart.  She was glad that I didn’t tell her early on because she too knew that she’d have worried herself to death and she’s very glad to know that my doctor is on top of things, being very proactive in trying to prevent a recurrence.  I have a lot more family members to tell in the next year and I anticipate that many of those conversations will be challenging.  But, if I can tell people I’ve never met about my experiences I owe it to my family to tell them myself.

Today I had an appointment with my OB Gyn.  I see her every four months and have seen her at least that often since my diagnosis.  She’s very proactive with my treatment and I tell her every time I see her how thankful I am for that.  I do not, however, thank her for the pain she inflicts on me during every visit.  The biopsies that I have are called “Endocervical Curettage” (ECC for short).  This means that she is removing tissue from my cervical canal.  In my experience the numbing shots that they can give don’t numb the cervical canal so I’ve given up asking for them.  Today was NOT a good biopsy day for my cervix.  As soon as the doctor told her nurse that my cervix was moving away from her I knew what was coming… I’m not sure what it’s called but it’s like a speculum for your cervix and it really hurts when they use it.  Imagine having a charlie horse that’s making every muscle in your abdomen tie themselves in knots.  That’s what happens to me when they use this torture device (BLECH!).  Thankfully, the procedure only takes about five minutes and then I get to lay on the table for another five minutes to make sure that I’m okay to get up.  I passed out from the pain once, the first time I had an ECC after having a cervical conization procedure, and she’s pays very close attention to me now.  I guess that having a patient pass out mid procedure is not a good thing ;-)  Now I get to wait up to three weeks for my results, which is sheer torture.  Every time I think about it I remember the phone call that started with “are you somewhere you can talk” and all of the emotions of that challenging time come flooding back to me.  So, I focus on family, friends, work, and fun to try to keep my mind from going too far down that path.  Fingers crossed for a good result!!

I hope that all of you had as many things to be thankful for as I have.  Even with challenges and frustrations life is a beautiful thing  :-)

~Cindy (AKA, Shaping up in Sacramento)

Turkey, and Stuffing and Pie...OH MY!!!!

The Holiday Season is fast approaching and with it many delicious food temptations.  Mine happens to be pumpkin pie...I love pumpkin pie!!!  I know that I need to make the right choices this holiday season to keep on track with my weight loss and my goal of participating in the big race next fall.

I have been researching on-line healthy, less calorie options for holiday fare and was amazed at the ideas and suggestions out there.  I am definitely going to try some of them out and also plan on increasing my work outs during the holiday season, so that I may have the occasional treat.  Who knows maybe I will even find a tasty healthier version of pumpkin pie!!!

I am so glad that I am participating in this challenge though because I have already lost weight, my clothes are fitting better and I have more energy. 

Thanks for all of the support and encouragement that people have been giving us and keep it going because it really does make a difference!!!

Have a great week!

Slimmin' in Seattle

Incentive!!

Boy oh boy did I get some last weekend!  Have you ever gone go kart racing?  Not the Scandia miniature golf kind.  I mean the cool karts that go really fast.  The karts where you can skid around corners like you're one of the drivers in that Tokyo Drift movie.  Well, as you can see from the picture, these things are fairly small and really low to the ground.  Once I got my behind wedged into that narrow seat and drove the kart around the track for a while I worked up a sweat just trying to get out of it.  I'm pretty sure that I was about as graceful as a turtle on its back and, for a while, I wondered if they'd need the jaws of life to pry me out.  A very sweet friend offered to try to help me out of the kart but I declined for fear of pulling her in with me.  I found my own escape route.  In all honesty, it probably took about a minute to get out of the thing.  But, it felt like an eternity.

All in all, a really great day with friends served two purposes - 1) making some great memories, and 2) incentive to work hard at this challenge, to remind me to focus on the goal of making positive life changes, and a reminder that just getting around in this world will be easier once I'm traveling in a smaller frame.

I hope that you all have a great weekend!  I'm hoping to fill mine with some gym time, good friends, and sleep :-)

Bye for now,
Cindy

Hello from Cindy - AKA Shaping up in Sacramento

Hi everyone!

I'm Cindy, the California girl in the challenge.  I'm super excited about the Survivor Slim down not only because it's a chance to start enforcing some positive, healthy lifestyle changes but also because I get to work really closely with two amazing ladies - Tamika and Pam.

Tamika, Pam, and I were all in Chicago over the weekend for the National Cervical Cancer Coalition's annual conference and, boy is it hard to stick to healthy eating at a conference!  The hotel food is mostly bread, pasta, and fruit but I was happy to be able to find a salad now and then.  Many of the ladies at the conference already knew about the slim down and most of them were really encouraging and were even talking about joining us for the triathlon next October.  Unfortunately, one of them wasn't so encouraging (although I honestly think that she thought she was helping).  The night of the cocktail reception that kicks off the conference I totally avoided the pasta table, only eating salad and one prawn for dinner, and having one glass of white wine to wash it down.  Someone came up to me  while I was eating my salad and asked "does all of this fit into your diet?".  I'm not sure how any of you would feel about that but it felt extremely judgmental and unsupportive to me.  I felt so good about controlling my portions and staying away from bad carbs and then someone who has never had to battle her weight asks that question.  Luckily, Tamika and Pam were there to lift my spirits and we all enjoyed the rest of the evening - including our late night workout after the reception :-)

My uncle sent me a joke the other day that I thought was funny.  Hope you do too...

I just had a call from a Charity asking me to donate some of my clothes to the starving people throughout the world.
I told them to go to hell!!  Anybody who fits into my clothes isn't starving!!

Thanks for following us along our journey!  I'll be back again soon.

~Cindy

My Date with IHOP!

This morning I had a meeting scheduled for 9am at IHOP. Normally, I would be excited to get out of the conference room, but since starting this "slimdown" I wasn't exactly thrilled. I knew the temptation would be there for chicken fried steak smothered in gravy and I was going to be with a group of people who know how to chow down - LOL!

But, I did the smart thing and planned ahead. I figured with this movement to slim down America that surely IHOP would have a calorie friendly menu - and they did! ;-). It's called, "IHOP for Me" and it literally was just for me! If you log on to IHOP's website click on "IHOP for Me" under the menu tab. They have menu items under 600 calories that they call "smart everyday choices". I choose the spinach, mushroom & tomato omelette for me and was happy and pleasantly full without finishing it.

It's all about lifestyle changes. I want to be healthy and I feel like that simple food selection helped me get one step closer to my goal. I also have to admit that I was inspired by Mo'Nique after catching a glimpse of her new late night talk show and her own personal slim down. Mo' is a self proclaimed "Fat Girl" and she has helped many big girls embrace their curves and rolls. I love what she is doing and I don't think she's selling out to the big girls, I think she's getting ready for her future.


Tamika
"Minimizing in Maryland"

Hello from Pam AKA "Slimmin' in Seattle"

Hi everybody!!!  I am Pam from Seattle, aka Slimmin' in Seattle.  I want to keep all of you updated on how things are going so far.  Well, so far so good!  Breakfast has been the easiest meal thus far, as I am a big fan of oatmeal and have already been eating that for my morning meal for awhile.  Steel cut oatmeal and old fashioned oats are not as bad as people think that they are.  Spice them up with some cinnamon, or fresh fruit!!  Yummy!  My biggest challenge will be to stay away from ice cream and fancy coffee drinks...I live in Seattle home of Starbucks, what more can I say.  Today though I switched my morning java from the calorie laden Carmel Macchiato to the more diet friendly Americano.

I am very excited about going through this life changing challenge with Tamika and Cindy.  What great women and an inspiration to all of us!  I know that there will be blood, sweat and tears along the way, but I truly believe that together that we can accomplish our goal of getting fit.  We are cancer survivors and that has made us the women who we are today and will help propel us to new begininnings and better health.

Talk to all of you soon and please continue to follow us through this amazing journey.

Pam :)